As the year winds down, a lot of us start doing the same thing. We look back at what we shipped, how we showed up for our teams and our families, and where we want to grow next year. We ask ourselves, what is going on my annual performance review? Am I becoming the type of person I want to be?
I am absolutely in that camp.
I took a little time off over the holidays and used it to look in the mirror. Not only at what I delivered at work, but at how I operated through the year as a person. What I found is a familiar pattern: a strong sense of responsibility, very high standards, and a tendency to carry more weight than is actually mine to carry.
I wanted to get this down, as well as where I want to go. It is partly personal reflection and partly a commitment to how I want to operate going forward, both as a professional and as a human being who would like to avoid turning everything into a dumpster fire in my head and letting everything feed off everything else.
Owning Responsibility Without Owning the Universe
One of my core beliefs is that if something is important to you, you will take care of it. I learned that from having a bike as a child, and it has carried through into my career and my family life.
If I am attached to an initiative in any way, I operate with the belief that it is on me to prepare, anticipate problems, and make sure things go as smoothly as possible. When they do not go smoothly, I have a habit of taking it hard. I want success for all of the projects I am on and every project around me.
I need to recognize that I can care deeply and act responsibly while also accepting that not everything is in my control.
That means a few adjustments in how I process ideas:
Accepting that not every outcome is a direct reflection of my competence, contribution, preparedness, interest, or effort.
Understanding more of the situation and the accepted risks and outcomes without immediately judging myself harshly.
Separating what I can influence from what is simply the reality of the situation.
Part of me hates that I even have to write this. It reminds me of a phrase I heard from a developer early in my career: “That is not my job,” said in response to fixing something only partially. It set off a few people and could probably be its own post with names changed.
I need to recognize that this is not about lowering the bar. It is about refusing to crush myself under a bar that nobody can realistically hold up. I have seen people try to do it all and watch their lives fall apart. Their relationships suffer, their families see them differently, and their health goes sideways from late nights and terrible food choices.
I would rather not end up there.
Evolution of Broken Intellisense
I genuinely enjoy learning, staying up to date, and sharing what I know. The idea of a “blog” might feel about twenty years out of date, but I also recognize that reading/writing lets you go deeper than surface level posts or quick chats. A blog is not a book, but it does force you to put ideas into a consumable and detailed format.
I have toyed with the idea of doing YouTube videos, a podcast, or weekly shows on Twitch. One thing is clear: I want to do more than drop an article once a month. I want Broken Intellisense to become more of a dumping ground for ideas and articles.
Not everything has to be perfectly polished. I said that when I started writing again. What I do know is that more frequent, honest content will create a more meaningful impact beyond my day to day team.
I will be honest, I do not like surface level knowledge. I like to know everything. To me, that is part of becoming an expert. I recently renewed my love for reading by shifting into a bit more fiction, a genre I hardly ever reach for. That change actually reenergized my interest in reading technical content as well.
Who knows. I do know that I want to experiment more.
I expect more focus related to technical leadership. I am going to be less afraid to “fail” or look silly. In fact, I probably need more things out in the world that I personally view as failures. If you never fail, how do you know you are pushing yourself to your actual capabilities?
In Summary
Weekly content, even if it is unfinished.
More leadership content than I have done in the past.
A better opportunity for people to interact with me and my ideas.
I am going to push myself to make more mistakes in public.
We are going to read six books on leadership this year.
I am bringing back book summaries like I used to do.
Follow me everywhere, because I will be trying different things.
Earn the AZ-204 Certification
If you have talked to me in the last seven or eight years, you know I have been toying with the idea of getting a certification. I start, I stall, certifications change, I fall into slumps, and the cycle repeats.
Not this year.
I am close to having this one, and I want to finish it. Help me. Keep me accountable. I am going to get the AZ-204 certification this year.
When I look at the skills outline, a lot of it overlaps with what I already do day to day. I know how to use this stuff. The barrier at this point is intimidation. Early in my career, one of the smartest developers I knew failed a certification exam. That stuck in my head and made certifications feel impossible.
The funny part is that I do not remember what his exam was on, how hard it was, or what his actual preparation looked like. I am also not sure he was as great as I thought at the time. I was an impressionable young lad and his story got lodged in my brain as a cautionary tale.
So this probably ties directly into everything I wrote earlier. I want to turn AZ-204 into a different kind of content stream too. Maybe I will write a whole new series that follows the journey. Maybe I will build a few reference projects and share what I learn along the way. We will see.
What I do know is that there will be content around the path to AZ-204. I will need dedicated time to study that is not just “I skimmed the skills outline for blog material.” There has to be focused learning time that exists for its own sake.
Yeah, I Know
I get it. This is a lot. I know I have the passion for this, and I also know real life exists with all of its demands and complications.
The truth is, I find this fulfilling. I enjoy doing this. This is fun for me.
I like using my head and learning. I recognize that the industry is shifting, and I need to stay up to date. This is how I do it. I am going to have to keep track of all of this. This is how I advance my career. This is how I stay relevant.
I am excited for the new year. I have projects I want to build, ideas I want to explore, and a brain I plan to keep very busy.
Let us see where it goes.
